INTERVIEWER: What exactly is SchMerzP¿nkDaDa? 

LASSE A73: It is a joke. A punk joke.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: SchMerzPunkDaDa is the only true and originalÊ trashpunkcore concept in the last seventeen years. We trash and trash allÊ common musical genres in a punk attitude. Ten Toes - One Hammer. Buy ourÊ albums, you conservative techno-drum'n'bass-rock-freak! Under the flag of SchMerzPunkDaDa we kill music by kissing it passionately, sucking it in and pissing it in your face! We are punk. We are Rock'n'roll. You have missed us.

BOE A22: The SchMerzPunkDaDa as I see it is the worst attempt to be cool and 'anti' I have ever seen or heard. Oh my God! Hope they get their stuff out so we can get finished with it. 

INTERVIEWER: Is the Replika branch in Norway the "main headquarters"?

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: No. No. No. Here in Replika we are INDEPENDENT. PleaseÊ be careful not to mix Replika with Rep-UB-lika. We do business with themÊ though, they are the ACHIEVEMENT. We are the ACTION - we run our own labelÊ now, Major Ego Produkt, with some various sub labels to the sub sub labelsÊ sub obviously! The fractions here are so far _Replika, _Politika,Ê _Epeleptika, _Vodka and _Erotika. It should not be to difficult toÊ understand why we want this control over product. We do not want to ruinÊ the ambient intellectual spiritual neo this'n'that etno image of the core.Ê And because we were granted this freedom over our own means, we do getÊ along quite well, at least at the moment. There has been some majorÊ quarrels at hand, try figuring out what the collective Origami agents think of New Age, Conspiracy Theories, Drugs, Booze, Rock Music, whether or notÊ you like pickles on your kebab/or falaffel if you find meat to be murder... 

INTERVIEWER: Why do you think all this 'new noise' is coming out of Norway? 

LASSE A73: It must have something to do with all the ice and snow.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: Because by coincidence we come from here, and since weÊ are the best, well... I ca not be to blame for where my ancestors chose toÊ throw out the anchor, and maybe we will all escape the social democraticÊ dullness and go Hawaii anyway. Then the new noise will come out of Hawaii,Ê see. 

MAJOR EGO A777: Because we take the full consequence of the otherness of comingÊ from this distant area of the world. To us it becomes a natural thing toÊ make noise, specially because the pop music to come out of here (with a fewÊ exceptions) is so dreadful, the whole Norwegian music scene is soÊ post-anglo-americanised, so we simply head on in other directions. OneÊ could actually think that we had been a part of the eastern block, as farÊ as the inferiority leading to nationalism is concerned. This also resultsÊ in horrible musical bastards of rock or whatever it is called this week.Ê Among us we have those who will eventually noise all of 'em down, and thatÊ is good. 

INTERVIEWER: Have you ever been to the very top of Norway? 

MAJOR EGO A777: No. More expensive than going to the USA. 

LASSE A73: Depends on which side you choose to be up.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: I hate fish. Beef is difficult to get there, so I will not go. 

INTERVIEWER: What is Norway's best kept secret? If that is too a secret,Ê what is Norway's second best? 

LASSE A73: We are not killing the whales, it is all a big prank. That isÊ the second best secret, the best kept secret we can not reveal, but it hasÊ something to do with Grete Faremo and sodomy.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: Agarta! Ask your local freemason. But as the value canÊ not be revealed; the second best being that there is so much going onÊ between the young'n'horny and the polar bears (even Lasse gets this strangeÊ look and humid eyes when he sees a specially muscular and hairy example). 

MAJOR EGO A777: The best kept secret is that there is no Norway. The second bestÊ is that there is none. 

INTERVIEWER: What is your best joke about the Swedes? 

LASSE A73: Roxette.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: I most cetainly would not crack jokes at my neighbour. IÊ have never accepted any other geographical borders up here than theÊ Commonwealth of SKANDINAVIA and not even that, EUROPE maybe, no, uh, THEÊ WEST, no, it is THE WORLD or NOTHING. ---

BOE A22: Hello! BOE A22 here; I was not allowed to answer anything, MajorÊ Ego got really upset: 'This is a noise interview. That is my business! SoÊ keep off!'. Anyway; here is the answers from Major Ego and fill-ins by JUDGE REPLIKA A95.

INTERVIEWER: Describe your stance on beastiality. Do you find that this isÊ another frontier of sexual freedom yet to be demystified, or just a bunchÊ of sick country boys who can not get any... 

MAJOR EGO A777: What are my stances on beastiality? Well, there is enough to goÊ around. As a good maximalist I have sworn my will to fight beastiality, notÊ because of morality, but because it is a punk thing to do in our ranks.Ê Honestly; I am bored to LIFE by all this mansonian death valleyÊ isolationism or whatever. Stupid as ever. There is no frontiers of sexualÊ freedom outside YOUR head, so why not give some? Sick country boys usuallyÊ get some. I would rather DARE to choose life and its challenges. I ScreamÊ Beauty. Ice Cream Beauty!

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: What? 

INTERVIEWER: Describe the live performance of Replika. What goes into eachÊ set? Is there no idea mapped out before hand, or do you set up specificÊ parameters to follow, or is there just some sort of loose guidelines toÊ follow? 

MAJOR EGO A777: I will answer this as seriously as I can; there is at least twoÊ separate ways of Origami Replika live; it is the strict and thoroughlyÊ figured out SchMerzPunkDaDa concept. Here we are totally dominated by theÊ laws of popular music, carefully composing our evergreens, using a bit ofÊ this and a bit of that and nothing in between. That is when I am in charge,Ê with my range of skills in techno, dub, drum & bass and fuzzrock, goodÊ strong pop-fun with U2esque political correctness. Tasty. The second way isÊ when Lasse takes command, then it is mostly improvised noiseblasts withÊ some prerecorded tapes in the mix. You see, Lasse has a more 'academic'Ê angle on what he is doing, he wants to follow Merzbow and Masonna into theÊ galleries by stating to be an anti-artist. Sweet. Actually it is quiteÊ simple to comprehend the contradictions of his compositions; he rejects theÊ value of rhythms, at the same time he is the Scandinavian King of Pulses.Ê For me, I am more aware of my competence as a song-writer (having performedÊ a lot with Norwegian celebrities like Seigmen, Ariske Maur, Vampire StateÊ Building and Jon Eberson Group). I do not have this urge to hide my talentsÊ behind some arty image. But I think it is good to blend my intimate andÊ physical rock'n'roll know-how with his more mind-oriented 'Freeform Noise'.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: Judas Christ, this leads into the next back alley of egoÊ debate between Major Ego and Skolek Lasse. Oh, no! 

INTERVIEWER: Would you suck off Bruce Russell if he asked you to, politely?Ê If no, if he demanded? 

MAJOR EGO A777: I guess you should ask Judge Replika A95 about this and otherÊ issues of submission.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: If he asked me politely; NO! If he demanded it; well,Ê then...oh, there is a scenario. Depends on what he is wearing, I would likeÊ to see him as one of those chicks-with-dicks... But what the heck, there isÊ a lot of other more obvious options on the meat market... 

INTERVIEWER: Can you define the context in which you guys create noise? IsÊ it a controlled setting, or does anything go? Do you have any hopes forÊ world domination, i.e. mass consumption of Republika, and if this happened,Ê would you object to it? Would you ever change your sound to reflect kurrantÊ trends in the noise world?

BOE A22: There is strict order and discipline in our way of creatingÊ noise. It is a controlled setting, and we do not just let anything go. I amÊ putting together a tape compilation just now called 'I Hate NoiseÊ Compilations' to fight against the current submissive noise fashion (inÊ order to get everyone to recognise us as the grandfathers of noise, we knowÊ others came before us, but so fucking what!?). Here in Norway right now youÊ will see bankiers and construction workers on the bus, deeply into someÊ noise artist or other on their walk-men. Noise music is used in commercialsÊ and as jingles for the sports and news broadcasts. If you go to theÊ hairdresser, he will probably hum along the lines of a Whitehouse classic.Ê Latest Algerian maniac massacre draped in the sounds of NON. As he wantedÊ it. So, we are up against big forces. The death camp imagery has now goneÊ commercial, so we laugh at the industrial sheep and worship the polarÊ bears. 

MAJOR EGO A777: It is actually my duty to become a rock'n'roll star, as I haveÊ dreamt about working with Madonna, Neil Young and Bowie for many years, andÊ The People need and deserve me. I don not give a fuck about poverty andÊ sub-culture, I want cash. I want everything to splash out in the open, forÊ everyone to see and hear, information/entertainment overload. ThisÊ questions always kicks me into politics, so I will shut up. 

INTERVIEWER: What is it like being in a band with a guy named Lasse? SurelyÊ I am not alone in thinking I would make fun of him for such a girly name...

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: You should be aware that the honourable old Finnish nameÊ Lasse Marhaug means 'The One Whose Cum Always Glistens' and that Lasse is aÊ huge blonde with divine muscles... So, he kind of gets the girls going, forÊ me to pick up after he has thrown them away. The show must go on, we haveÊ just exchanged the Coke for Ice Cream! 

MAJOR EGO A777: Do not pick on the boss of my record company, I am signed up andÊ gagged... 

INTERVIEWER: What is your opinion on such harsh noise artists as Aube,Ê Macronympha & The Haters? 

MAJOR EGO A777: I prefer Aube, Macronympha & The loveably Haters. I love theÊ Haters, that is my idea of love performance. I like them all on good days.Ê Aube delivers equisite soundscapes (I will not use the a-word) for myÊ private affairs (nor the f-word).

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: Who are they? I make noise, but I never ever listen toÊ it. Life is too short for listening to noise music. 

INTERVIEWER: Do you find yourself getting laid more now that you haveÊ become a noise artist? 

MAJOR EGO A777: I am married (to a girl, that is), so out of matters ofÊ descretion I can not answer this.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: The problem of the noise scene is that there is only sexÊ on the record covers and in the videos. I do not think noise people fuck,Ê mostly because they waste their energy before getting to 'it'. Country &Ê Western people fuck more often, for them wild sex is natural. Bikers oftenÊ found in bondage, cashiers in dog-collars. I have seen that in the bestÊ magasines and contact ads. Noise people peep, Country & Western & CommonÊ people do. That is too bad, how shall the next noise generation prevailÊ without even being born? This is a matter of great concern. 

INTERVIEWER: Do you object to being called an 'avant-garde' 'progressive'Ê or 'noise' artist? I am trying to look at the rethorical implications ofÊ those labels, and what they mean. Any feedback on this that you want toÊ give would be wonderful.... 

MAJOR EGO A777: No, I do not mind. I guess that you should ask some of the otherÊ more 'artistic and academic' agents of Origami Republika that, I am sureÊ you would get a bunch of essays on this theme in return. I do not careÊ about wasting my time on the Words they use. The rethorical implication ofÊ this fact is that their efforts of labelling only heads back a them, theyÊ are stuck in that circle, and it is not my concern. 'Avant-garde' - fuck,Ê what did the futurist do way back at the time of my grandparents puberty?Ê 'Progressive' - fuck, what is not; errors, catastrophes, candle-lightÊ dinners, curiosity, aggression, relaxation??? 'Noise artist', well. I am aÊ musician, they called Rolling Stones 'terrible noise' when they cameÊ around, I guess it is fate. And a secure proof on my ability and potentialÊ of becoming a true rock'n'roll dinosaur. Origami Replika in Jurassic Park -Ê The Musical, on Broadway, or the Hollywood Bowl. To me it is always sixÊ o'clock.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: They can call it whatever they want, as long as theyÊ keep feeding my bank account. I will give you feedback, ma-a-an! --- 

INTERVIEWER: Origami Replika is a "musical" group or project you work with.Ê Who are some of the other people involved and how did you meet them? 

MAJOR EGO A777: We are constantly trying to hinder the core 'philosophers' ofÊ the Collective Origami Republika misusing our good name for their benefit.Ê In their Y-files (later leading to The Almost Invisible Art Of... book)Ê you will probably see several early concerts labelled as _Replika, justÊ because they made some noise. Origami Replika was started as a reaction toÊ all this myth'n'magic mumbo-jumbo they spread around in their daftÊ 'manifestoes', but in stead of isolation we chose to participate on our ownÊ terms. If - like they try to promote - Origami Republika is going to beÊ some sort of utopian pseudo-world, it is crucial to have an inner point ofÊ criticism. We declared ourselves separated from _Republika last year, afterÊ some quarrels on economical priorities. We even threatened to stop usingÊ the Origami suffix, but we called a truce when they offered us to be inÊ charge of our own assets. So now we run the Major Ego Produkt label, andÊ all profits from our work goes directly back to us. So now we record andÊ release whatever we want, side by side with the other fractions.

The coreÊ members of _Replika are Lasse Marhaug A73 (of Jazzassin Records), Boe A22 (Republika coordinator), Kelly Braaten A34 (of Medit Industries),Ê Nils 'Christ' Valle A100 (of Urd Barbarian), Mads Staff Jensen A101 (ofÊ Clop Neplat), Depla A117 (of Wertham) and Major Ego (of Lesser Gods). WeÊ make original trash music, remakes, broken techno and punk sarcasm,Ê concrete music, harsh ambient, powerelectonics, whatever we feel like. WithÊ the simplest of means and the maximum output. Tape granades constantlyÊ being thrown out in the global network, occasional cd«s and vinyl. OurÊ philosophy is that of no philosophy, we just do. If the other RepublikantsÊ are so open, it has to be room for us. That is usually the ending point ofÊ any 'autonomous' movements; can they deny us our freedom? No! --- 

INTERVIEWER: How and when did you discover masturbation? 

LASSE A73: I can't remember. Pretty early I think. Long before puberty.Ê Major Ego got into Psychic TV as a 9 year old, so he did scarification andÊ drinking piss long before he learned to just wank his wee-wee to feel good.Ê Nah, I'm being cruel now, but he's such a pretentious asshole it woundn'tÊ surprise me. 

INTERVIEWER: Have you ever been in a sexual situation and wanted toÊ deficate on your partner? 

LASSE A73: No, but I've been studio situations where I'd wanted to deficateÊ on my fellow band member. 

INTERVIEWER: What do you see as the current state of uncoventional music inÊ the United States, coming from an outside source? What are the parallelsÊ with your own experiences in Norway? 

LASSE A73: As far as the noise scene goes America seems to have a lot ofÊ interesting artists, but you can't seem to get along. You're always arguingÊ and talking shit about each other. Of course I see the parallels withÊ Replika, but that's just one person creating nausea (Mr.Ego), other thanÊ that everybody in Norway gets along. And there's plenty of interestingÊ artists here as well. 

INTERVIEWER: How long has Major Ego been schizophrenik? How long has LasseÊ been gay? 

LASSE A73: I'm not gay. 

INTERVIEWER: How long has Judge Replika been a complete tight ass? 

LASSE A73: He's not the tight ass in Replika. 

INTERVIEWER: Do you own handguns? Were you aware that it's not against theÊ law to fire at someone on the highway if they threaten you with theirÊ vehicle in America? 

LASSE A73: Is against the law to fire at someone in the same band if theyÊ threaten you with their pretentious bullshit? ---

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: SchMerzP¿nkDaDa (check the speling moron) is the musicÊ and concept of Major Ego and I hope we«re done with that now. With the 7"Ê CD and Commercial Album LP out we only need labels for the live CDs andÊ some remix 7"s, and hopefully then he will be satisfied. We are not goodÊ friends anymore, but his musics deserve to live.

BOE A22: Origami Replika recently came back from a 19 concertÊ European-tour, the absolutely last live presentation of SchMerzP¿nkDaDaÊ concept. We couldn«t bring Major Ego himself, as it would have been realÊ fighting all the way. But I think we did a pretty decent show anyway. NowÊ Origami Replika will take on other directions and constellations. And weÊ wait for our own music to come out, that is; our remakes of Merzbow andÊ Kapotte Muziek. We have no plans to tour with Origami Replika. OrigamiÊ Replika live is (except from SchMerzp¿nkDaDa) one of the best and mostÊ powerful happy noise orchestras around.

JUDGE REPLIKA A95: I have had homosex on stage. Why? Because it is the onlyÊ time boys will 'play' with me, so I hide it as performance. It makes me allÊ warm inside. I prefer modern girls on longer term relationships. Homosex isÊ the last taboo in our 'alternative-sex-art' scene, so it is self-evidentÊ that I have to check it out. Sometimes man need a hard strong cock up hisÊ ass to see where he«s at...specially if you are a vegan, then you can enjoyÊ meat without bad conscience.

BOE A22: Last year we played support for EinstŸrzende Neubauten, as theirÊ manager asked us to. We were young, and they were still going strong takenÊ in count that I bought my first EN album in 83, when I was only 14. Then weÊ had the great pleasure of playing support for one of todays finest bandsÊ Culver. This trio really got the swing on the noise thing. I am very proudÊ of having shared stage with these two important groups in musical development.